Follow Up to My Cannabis Break

It was three weeks ago that I told you all I was taking a break from Cannabis. I think I've processed that week long enough. Time to tell you what happened.

I started this blog as a way to process the changes that I have been going through since starting Cannabis as my medicine. The desire to educate people grew the more I learned and realized how little actual truth about this herb is out there. 

I have to state, the changes that sometimes occur are not always medical, or physical. In my case I was very religious my whole adult life. Like, the kind of Christian who wouldn't let my kids watch Disney movies cuz they were full of witchcraft, or magic. I was THAT kind. I shutter, and have much regret for who I was back then. But I try to let the voice of wisdom speak louder and remind me that I only did the best I could with the knowledge I had back then. My best just happens to be better today then my best back then...that's all. (ok...it's not always better...I'm still a work in process.)

My last intake of cannabis in any form was a Friday night. I was off fully until Tuesday evening when I started to ingest it so I could sleep. I didn't start back to my day use, vaping and/or smoking until Saturday night a week later. It has taken these last two weeks to re-acclaimate and mentally/emotionally process all that has gone on internally.

I had a VERY bad first weekend. My biggest physical issue was restless legs, preventing me from sleeping. They hadn't actually start bothering me until day 2. But you can only go for so long without sleeping well. My other physical issues, pain, were easily dealt with by using Tylenol and Aleve. (These are the two drugs I've been on for years and the reason I started Cannabis in the first place was to get off them so as not to over stress my kidneys any further). My mental issues were mostly due to the ridiculous amount of stress I was under for a prolonger period of time. Years. And a big contributing factor was/is my ever present self doubt; doubting my judgment and well...everything. Much of this self doubt comes from the shame associated with my previous religiosity. (Not that church caused it, but rather for me it fed an already established shame and made it grow.)

A small example of how bad I was at the beginning of this pursuit; by the middle of the afternoon on the first Saturday I was literally packing all my cannabis related things into a box and hiding it all in my closet. Bongs, lighters, weed, printed material about cannabis, and my colouring page from #myTHCbox also went. I couldn't stand the sight of any of it so I cleared it out of sight completely. I was at the point of hating that I had ever started it. I deleted groups, and unfollower Cannabis community Facebook pages. I just couldn't have been more hateful towards cannabis.

By Tuesday afternoon I had pulled out a little weed to roll a joint and I start back eating my AVB with ice cream at bed time just so I could sleep. But I had still decided I'd not ever go back to using Cannabis as much as I had been. I could deal with the physical pain by using pharma products and I was willing to take the risk of damaging my kidneys. I got over that by the next Saturday.

My last day off weed was horrid. I was unable to think a positive thought. But by dinner I realized I was on a bad thought track and knew the only way to combat it was to grab my cannabis and get couch-locked! It worked too. Stress left. I calmed the fuck down and realized the sky was not falling. Next day I had the best Sunday a person could have.

And as I processed that weedless week I know that my emotional instability was not and is not caused by my Cannabis use. I really was under a crap load of situations. Most of which have now been resolved, thankfully! It just took a ridiculous amount of time. A couple issues remain, but I'm working on those with Mindfulness practices I learned in classes given by a medical Doctor here in the city; learning some new (and badly needed) coping skills, gaining insight into the causes of stress, and seeing a counsellor. I've spoken with both the M.D. and the counsellor about my shame issues that were fed and grew to huge proportions under the guise of a loving God and both have applauded me for getting out of something that caused me to feel so much shame. Unfortunately that doesn't remove some of the wrong beliefs I still have. That might take years to do in some cases. Some of those shame issues are what had me second guessing my original choice to start cannabis. So while I was six feet under all these major stressors recently those very shame issues were raising an even stronger opposition. But my week off helped clear up and remove the lack of trust I had in myself, at least regarding the issue of Cannabis as medicine!

What this whole week taught me:

The whole reason I took a weedless week was to see if cannabis was causing or creating more stress and drama in my life. I went through a strange week, denying its effectiveness first, accepting its medical use in one area of my life, and then embracing it fully again.

I've learned that Cannabis was not causing me to stress out, life was. Cannabis helps me realize what is no big deal so I can focus on what is.
I know that popping a low dose canna-cap of a Sativa/CBD mix allows me to chase the blues away. I don't feel any cerebral effects but I don't get dragged down by the time I've finished my first cup of coffee either, which can happen if I don't medicate effectively.
I know that I need to get more serious about keeping connected to the larger medical cannabis community. Not that there is anything wrong with the few people I've started to get to know, I just know they don't have all the answers either. Some of them are just as new (or newer) than me. But there is a world full of life-long medical cannabis patients who have a wealth of information that I want to learn from.

I know that I don't know enough about how to medicate properly for pain. I am still medicating with big pharma for pain and inflammation. I want and need to know more.
I'm also allowing myself some grace. My original pain issue was better for six months. I had more mobility and less restrictions due to pain since starting cannabis back December 2014. My new injury occurred mid August. It was intense! I was SO disappointed by the set back! So now, rather than being disappointed that I had to go back on big pharma drugs after I had only just gotten off of them I am learning to be ok with what is right now. Unfortunately I also badly sprained my ankle two weeks ago so I again had to increase my dose of pharma to the max while this newest injury heals. But giving myself a break (or grace) is exactly what I need to learn here, so I'm learning.

Although this may not have been the best way to do it, I do believe this break was a success. I've learned more about me, and what works for me because of it. And as a side note, three weeks out I have felt an internal shift recently that I'm hoping is permanent. It's a healthier perspective with less self doubt. If I went through a hellish week just for that it was well worth it!

Strain Review: Flower from HBB Medical Inc.

Fredericton has its first Medical Marijuana Dispensary!


Welcome to the neighbourhood HBB Medical Inc.! I will do a post later introducing you all to a dream come true! I literally didn't think this would happen for years, yet here we are. Opened April 2016 and I've been in and am doing my first review. More on them later.

Purchase Date: May 5, 2016

Strain: Champagne 

CBD/Sativa   1g

Cost $10

CBD 8%

THC 6%

Look of Bud: The nug looks dense and full and well trimmed. Lovely mix of dark and mid greens with long orange hairs. Tricomes are visible creating a medium amount of frost. 

Smell of Bud: Scent is fruity and sweet, reminiscent of Sweet Island Skunk. Slight pungent hint of skunk with an earthy undertone. 

Handling of Bud: Upon removing the flower from the plastic packaging I immediately noticed the bud still contained moisture. I was disappointed in its lack of proper curing. The bud did not grind well in my hand grinder because of this. It also took way more fire than fully cured bud needs to light. Next morning the bud I had left in the grinder was properly dried and easier to burn. 

Burn and Effect: When smoked from a bong it gave a good white smoke and produced white ash.

It has a slight floral and earthy taste. After 2 min I felt a slight buzz, 4 minutes a medium head high. At 8 minutes I was at full effect which is a nice head tingling relaxed contentment. I feel happy to sit here writing my review, or moving indoors cuz the wind is picking up. The low THC of 6% is deceiving though. The relaxed energy I have is perfect for having a conversation with the Bell Fibre Op lady at the door, or getting creative with what I’m going to do in my next art class (or what to say for the next sentence). Music is standing out more to me than it does with some other strains. This is the perfect strain for me for when I want to dance around to loud music while cleaning the house. Or getting physically active like working out or going for a run. 

When vaped the taste is distinctively pine and lemon with a slight skunky, earthy undertone. I found the taste rather pleasant. The effect time is about the same vaping as it is smoking. Length of time the effects lasted was longer than I expected. I noticed a slight brain tingle even 3 hours after I had smoked a bowl around 5:30pm last evening.

Grade: 

My grade scale will be out of five. A point per category listed above with 0, .5, 1 as possible scores.

I give Champagne from HBB Medical Inc. a  3/5 

Look: 1 

Smell: 0.5

Handling: 0 *not fully cured

Burn: 0.5

Effect: 1

I’d like to note that there is a risk of mold growing in the bud if moisture is left in it and then packaged. Check your package before you make your purchase, as long as there is no mold evident it is possible to complete the curing process yourself at home. Simply pop your purchased buds into a brown paper bag and let sit in a cool DRY place for a day or two. 

Last thoughts: I’m pleasantly enjoying Champagne by HBB. I will purchase it again as it is a great choice for my day use cuz it makes me happy and productive. It was also a decent cost at $10 per gram. I would recommend this strain, with the note to be aware of moisture on this current batch.

Check out my second Strain Review Here!

Medicated Oil and Chocolates

With my third purchase made, received and tried out over the last week I was ready to make more medicated oil.  (I know, I’m behind and didn’t tell you about the first time)

The purpose of this oil, though edible is for topical application to my knees and sore arm. I found the topical use helps to decrease my joint pain enough to warrant daily use. My test included daily application for a week followed by two days of not using it. I definitely regretted not using it those two days! There was an increase of pain, a decrease in speed of movement and a decrease in my ability to be on my feet moving. I haven’t gone without using my oil since. 

And then I did something that seemed only logical, yet risky. I rubbed some medicated oil on my daughters back. She had back surgery in April and is still dealing with lots of pain. She medicates with an Extra Strength Tylonal and an Aleve every 8 hours, but her pain and the shooting nerve pain that occurs numerous times a day just makes her miserable, tired and less focused on her last few weeks of school. The next morning she said it helped and wanted me to put some on her back again before school. She decided to also try putting it on her rib cage under her arm where a shooting nerve pain runs. After two days of applying it in both places I asked some important questions. No, she wasn’t feeling any high at all. Yes, she noticed a decrease in pain in her back, but the effect faded part way through the day. (We need two applications a day if possible). And lastly, regarding the spot under her arm, the CannaCoconut Oil decreased the severity and the frequency of the “attacks” of shooting pain that usually make her hold her breathe and grab her side when it occurs.  Such SWEET success!! 

Her pain is not gone mind you. But I’m not about to medicate her any further than with topical oil. And she has expressed that she is not interested in that anyway. I’m ok with what we are doing for her. Its helping and eventually I’m guessing she will be able to wean off the phamra-drugs first. So what this means for me is making lots more oil to share. 

With my first tiny batch of Infused Coconut Oil (only about a tablespoon worth, skimmed out of my infused oil I made for baking) all but gone I was in need of making more.  Ingredients were Coconut Oil, and three hand picked strains best for pain management. For a wide spectrum of coverage I choose AviDekel (high CBD best for inflammation), Cognitiva (UK Cheese - a Sativa), and Sedamen (Pink Kush - an Indica). 

Medicated Coconut Oil

The Recipe :

1/4 cup of organic Coconut Oil

3.5 g of Cannabis of choice, ground but it doesn't need to be as fine as Shake Flour.
(See about the method I used here)

Put both in a cold pot and turn heat to lowest heat.
Allow coconut oil to melt and mix dry herb in well. 
Let sit on heat. Tiny bubbles that form in the oil are indication that the Cannabinoids are being absorbed by the oil. 

I nursed the mix for 2 hours. Low heat, off, low heat, off, repeat…Stirring (or swirling the pot) often. 

I strained through a small sieve into a coffee filter which was placed in a second larger sieve and over a bowl. The larger pieces of herb I pressed the oil out of into my glass storage jar with the back of a spoon. The coffee filter had very little plant matter, but what was there was very fine. The oil came out very clear and such a pretty colour! 

My dry herb was already crumble in the containers so I did not need to grind it. I do recommend it be at least as ground up as your hand grinder gets it. For baking, grinding it down to Shake Flour would be fine, but for topical oil I wanted only pure oil with little to no plant matter in it. I was very happy with the results of the coffee filter method instead of the cheese clothe. Though I did have to gently squeeze out the last half of the oil to speed up the process when the filter reached saturation. I feel there was not much oil lost to the filter.

In the end I had just under a 1/4 cup of Cannabis Infused Coconut Oil. But I couldn’t just stop there….Cuz I have started to consider making medicated chocolates and candies. I had saved a recipe to Pinterest for medicated chocolate bark. I halved the recipe and adapted it a bit to my taste. The original recipe can be found here….

Since a 1/4 cup is only 4 Tbsps I scooped out 1 Tbsp for a test batch.

CannaChocolates!

Ingredients:

 4 oz chocolate:(I used 2 oz of semi-sweet chocolate, and 2oz of 70% Chocolate)
1 Tbsp  Infused Coconut Oil (or Cannabutter)
(Bit of paraffin wax for consistency)
1/4 cup granola
Toppings:
1/4 cup  chopped dried cranberries
1/4 cup chopped pistachios 

Melt chocolate and infused oil over a double boiler and mix well until fully melted. 

After it was fully mixed I added a few bits of paraffin wax. Its used to make the finished product glossy, but since I added extra oil I didn't want my end result to melt in my hands, so the wax helps reduce that effect too.

Once fully melted and mixed I removed the bowl from the heat and added in my own home made granola, and all the chopped dried cranberries. (I had to chop more for the topping since I did that). 

In tiny chocolate cups (they are silver inside to let sticky candy or chocolate just slide out) I carefully spooned about 3 demi spoons into each cup, making 16. Working quickly before it cools too much I topped each cup with chopped Pistachios, then Chopped cranberries and as a finishing touch I dusted each with gold dust. Just cuz it’s for me doesn’t mean I can’t feel fancy!

Serving size for me is 2 chocolates. I wouldn't eat more then that before a work shift. It gives me a nice light sensation. One was too little. 

The math: 

1/4 cup oil =  (4 Tbsp) = 3.68g
1 Tbsp = 0.92g
Divided by 16 chocolates = 0.057g each.

It is true the dose is low. I’m not getting high as a kite off my chocolates. But according to research for medicinal purposes some issues are helped with just micro doses of Cannabis (Learn More Here). Its not really necessary to smoke or eat large amounts to feel the health benefits of Cannabis. I’m not really wanting to spend more money than I really need to that’s for sure! And I do see and feel the decrease of pain from the small doses I take throughout the day. 

Maybe I’ll try suckers next!